It’s About Writing, and So
Much More
Why I am a Writing Coach
“I want to be an author, but first I guess I’d better write a little more.” The comment jumped out at me from the student’s paper on his previous experiences with writing. We were getting to know each other: me, a writing coach, and him, a ninth-grade English student in our local public high school. “Really,” I said. “I’m an author, too, I’m working on a book now.” We had it—that instant connection that gets you talking in a meaningful way.
The young man was engaged and told me that he likes football and music and writes short stories. We talked about the writing process, and how editing and revising makes any piece stronger and better. I told him about the writing group I’m a part of that critiques each other’s drafts. Then he gave me a very serious look. “And did you feel disrespected when the people in your writing group criticized your writing? “No,” I answered slowly, “because I’ve learned how to separate my self from my writing. When someone criticizes my writing, it’s not me they are talking about. And have you ever felt disrespected when someone criticized your writing?” “No,” he answered, “but I do feel disrespected when kids do bad things to me like pouring water over my shoes at the drinking fountain. A kid did that the other day, and when I got mad and shoved him, I was the one who got in trouble.”
And so we talked about how that kid’s actions really were disrespectful, and about how sometimes high school kids don’t quite get it, and do mean things, but that’s no reflection on you, it’s a reflection on them. “You are good young man, and you deserve to be treated with respect,” I reflected back to him. Near the end of our twenty-minute coaching session, he raised his head high and said with conviction, “And if anyone says anything mean to me I know I don’t even have to listen to it, because I know I’m a good person.” Touchdown. I was so proud of him. When I see him next week I’ll check in with him about how he’s doing and continue to reinforce the values of holding yourself above the fray. We did get the writing assignment done that first day…and so much more.
Maureen Dixon is a writing coach with the WriterCoach Connection in the San Francisco Bay Area. The nonprofit organization trains volunteers from the community, who then work one-on-one with middle and high school students on their writing and critical thinking skills as part of their school day. See more about Maureen or follow her on Facebook.
